Ultimate guide to a semi-famous blogger (for female)

Like just Femez, not like xiaxue kind of famous.
Like erm...... the traffic is good enough to earn some income. but not good enough to earn you too many luxury trips....
You get what i mean rite? Like, semi-femez ??
I thought being a blogger must have pretty high level of writing standard, critical thinking, creativity, being sensitive with the current affair and things like that, but not really good at socializing (because they keep staring in front of PC??)

It turns out quite different, most bloggers are quite good at socialising. I then realize you don't really need to have high language ability (i.e. free grammar error) or be creative or be anything good, as long as you fullfill any 4 criteria and above, i am pretty sure you can be a semi-famous blogger

Ok, here comes the guide....

1.Be really good at photoshopping.  Like why bother dieting when you can photoshop, right? Or even better, try to use your photoshop skills to uglify other blogger you hate. Once the other blogger see it, they will start bitching you in their blog, and hence, you are famous, VOILA

2. Post your luxury/designer stuff

Owh..... you don't own any designer.... don't worry, you can......
a. borrow from your friends/your mum/ you cousie, etc. Worst, you don't have any rich friends ???
b. copy and paste using paint , like me...............

You don't even need photoshop to do that, with the cutting and pasting, you can just say they are yours. I mean after all, who knows? But keep in mind, most successful/rich bloggers don't boast about their luxury stuff. (They are really humble people, right?) They don't really bother taking this pictures, these bags normally come like a hidden background in the picture (i.e.behind the blogger)

Like really hidden if you can spot ....................................................

3. dare to be sexayy...

like really sexaayyyyy, YO !!!

Not to forget to upload your pictures of clubbing, being bootilicious and boobilicious!!


4. Upload your picture of you kissing with your bf 

and then the comment will ask you to stay sweet with your bf, hence, increasing traffic....... Because reader wants to know how long(or short) your relationship last........

5. Be more mature then your age, but really good at make up, such as

 CHUCKEI (18 )

 

Kmaey (17)

6. Tell the story of you and your bf, even though nobody ask you....

7. State how much and where you get every piece of your outfit, even though nobody ask you.....
Like you know how everybody does it in lookbook
And then complain how fugly the outfit is

8. Must use smartphone
i.e. Blackberry, Iphone, Android, etc. Because you need to keep checking your traffic and keep tweeting. And at the same time, have to take picture of like 'i am busy tweeting with BB'

9. Must camwhore all..................... the time, and you even state that in your blog 'i love camwhore, who doesn't'
then must make it very alluring

(even though you epic phailed)

And then the comment will be something like 'wah, you are soo.... slim, any diet tips' etc. etc.

10. Own a polaroid 

This is a pretty new trend actually .... But i reckon you need polaroid, because DC is soo.... uncool now


11. Being emo..... 
Take emo picture (The overall lighting must be dark) and say emo stuff like

So far i am still keeping the good attitude on blogging, and i am not sure how famous i can be.... I hope this guide help you to become a good blogger. If it doesn't  help you, you help me, k ? 

p/s: I am pretty sure I have offended a few bloggers in this posts, if i do, i am sorry. If sorry is not enough, fine, just bitch about me in your blog, and i think i am willing to accept. If i can't accept, i think i will just close my blog.